letters for a certain nobody. #2

14th April, 2017.
3:42 pm.

i miss the way your heart used to fuck mine in the middle of a crowd, as everyone looked over at us, without ever seeing how fast they slammed against our ribcages, while we tried to cage our flailing valves and aching veins that were too tired to scream, and yet too obstinate to stop fighting.

it’s all too very still now.

my body has lost it’s rebellion, and my mind has lost it’s battle, as they both stand silently over the tomb where parts of you lived within me long ago. everything that moves today, does so in denial- because acceptance hurts.

you could sew bones back into their sockets, and joints back into their folds, but the tears at the creases where you folded my breast as a keepsake cannot be joined anymore than you can reset the calendars to sail back through those months that lost their very name in the avoidance of yours.

i’m like a water molecule at the surface of silent lake- you crashed into me with a single violent kiss, and then skipped away, without ever turning around to watch me drown-

i miss the way you stole the clarity of the graceless stars that bewailed the loss of their entangled twin, with each breath.

ari.

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22 thoughts on “letters for a certain nobody. #2

  1. “i’m like a water molecule at the surface of silent lake- you crashed into me with a single violent kiss, and then skipped away, without ever turning around to watch me drown”
    i could read that line all day Ari, I could write a novel about it, I could relive unrequited love through it. Knife through the heart that somehow feels like caramel.

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  2. Did you have a twin sister? Or is this a metaphor. It had me at 100 on the fucking my heart scale. Till that. Only child so i wasnt sure if to take it literally or think outside my limited perspective and look at it metaphorical​y . Still loved it though. Or did I? Prop just loved how fucked my heart. Im such a glutton for punishment.

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    1. I wish, but no, no twin. Although I would love to have one. It’s a lot better than arse of a younger brother lol. The whole “entangled twin” thing is mostly the idea of quantum entanglement. Do you know about it? I’m a science student. It fascinates me. You change the properties of a particle, and it reflects simultaneously in it’s entangled mate. Distance is not a factor, it’s faster than the speed of light. I liked the idea of such a particle losing it’s mate (probably not even possible in reality, but I’m allowed my fantasies). And this is abstract, I guess everyone could take it how they perceive. My aunt thought of a child lost in the womb when she read it, I was mostly thinking of a lover. But the twin thing fits too. Fascinating! Thank you for the perspective. I don’t always think about every angle while writing, so it’s rather fun to see through other’s eyes 😀

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      1. Yes well, I come from Alabama and it has the worst economy in the US and also horrid public schools. I slept through HS got a 3.0 and me hate school to the point I went in military and skipped school. Find myself thinking of going back at this point for programming and web development. I love science but im probably on a bill nye level. Not quantam entanglement. Certainly worth a google and some reading. So you change my mind on pros and poetry and now scientific theories ivr never heard of. Fall hell, knowledge is a come up no matter wich way ya slice it and I was born in 82. Yea kinda old but it aint like I gotta foot in the grave already. To many books left to read. Dont kill me off just yet. Not needing the specs to read the blog…not yet. Maybe i’ll start writing about geezerdom in a few years…still got some traveling to do

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        1. Well don’t worry, I wasn’t exactly expecting everyone to think quantum entanglement when they read it. It was just an idea on my part. And well considering the fact that I was born in 98, you’re practically another generation for me lol. Don’t worry I wear glasses tho😂

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